Don't give your Tweens Acne.
Skincare for kids too young is going to cause BIG problems longterm.
On every girls Christmas list from the age of 8 and up is a mini-fridge. Not for snacks or sodas, but for skincare. What skincare you ask? The ones that they all are talking about (but have no clue what they are talking about) and the ones that are going to cause so many problems for them in a few short years. It’s alarmed me so much in the last few weeks that I had to take the time to write this because as a mother of 3 young girls, someone who now spends 99% of her time working in beauty and talking to experts, I feel like it is my duty to scare the $hit out of parents and kids alike. Save yourself the financial and emotional stress that surely will come down the road, read this and share it with your tweens. TRUST ME.
Young kids do NOT need skincare. You heard me. We know it. It’s marketing. And it’s marketing at its absolute finest. I want to meet the person who runs Drunk Elephant’s marketing because the fact that every single young girl knows this brand, covets it, is a sign of marketing genius. As a 45 year old woman, I strive to get the perfect complexion my 9 year old has. It’s soft, it’s smooth, its even and not a bump or patch of dehydration in sight. Why? Because her hormones haven’t kicked in yet. Her skin (and emotions) are still “balanced”. So why on earth would I allow her to put anything with the word “acid” or anything with pore clogging ingredients on her skin? What this will do is mess with her natural skin barrier. It will cause those pores to become clogged. It will create little rough bumps before mother nature is even ready for it. And when she does start to have those hormones kick in? The oil production will be in overdrive because it was already out of whack before.
Another issue that is happening is that kids don’t know how to use some of these products. One of my good friends daughters used a product that every young girl wants - the toner, which she applied to her face and left on - burned her skin. When she asked her dermatologist about it, the dermatologist immediately knew what the product was before she even said it. And proceeded to tell her she can’t count how many young girls have been in here with similar burns to their faces. These are 10 year old girls with gorgeous perfect skin. So now we are trying to heal burns to a beautiful cheek. If that isn’t effed up, I don’t know what is.
So when do we start skincare? It’s hard to say no to our kids when all their friends are doing things, right? I know I feel that way, and I say no to a lot of things. Maeve plays sports, so I let her have a little Drunk Elephant Jelly Cleanser to wash her face with in the shower after she has been playing sports. It’s a simple cleanser and she can still feel cool. Would I prefer that she use nothing? Yes I would. But I will give her an inch. She trusts me when I tell her the other stuff, thank God. But the time to start to introduce true skincare is when they start to get hormonal - right around the time they get their period. Because that is when things start to change and shift. Their oil production can go into overdrive - especially in the t-zone. Using gentle products, specifically in the t-zone at this time is a great idea. The Drunk Elephant Cleanser, Cetaphil, Ever + Eden Vitamin Face Wash, are all great options. And if skin is oily, you don’t need to be afraid of a moisturizer or a face oil. The worst thing you can do is not moisturize because that signals the body to produce even more oil - it does the opposite of what you might think. With all that said, don’t be afraid to take them to a great dermatologist - someone that will feel like a friend telling them what to do - not someone that feels out of touch. Ask your friends for recommendations of who they love. Or take them to yours if you love them. Skin is so important - it is such a tremendous part of our self-esteem, and at a pivotal age when these kids are figuring out who they are, are filled with all kinds of insecurities and peer pressure, we don’t need to make things harder on them.
Non-skincare beauty gift ideas. So your kiddo has a long list of skincare that now you don’t want to give them. What do you give instead? There is so much you can still do that is in the “beauty world” that makes them feel grown up. Maeve is obsessed with Ellis Brooklyn fragrances. They are delicate, don’t smell like cheap hookers and she is so cute spritzing it on every morning. Her go-to is Amber, but I’m getting her the mini-box of all the scents to try. They also have a Body Oil that I think will be a big hit - the skin on her arms and legs gets so dry in the winter months. The LaNeige Lip Masks are great stocking stuffers for the kids - and if your girls are like mine in the winter, they get massively chapped lips that almost burn. These are great healers overnight. The Sephora Face Wipes are on Maeve’s list and I’m ok with it - especially for her to keep in her backpack after she has played any sports. I also let her get this Hourglass Glitter Eyeshadow before a Daddy-Daughter dance and she will put it on when she has somewhere “fancy” to be. All these are easy gifts to give them that make them feel like part of this craze but we aren’t going to have to clean up the mess down the road. And a mess it will be - these brands are all going to be selling them acne products, they aren’t stupid!
And I’m not a total hardass. For Grace’s birthday I surprised them and took them to my amazing facialist Lika, and she treated them to “mini-facials” - using the most gentle mask that made them feel super cool and as if they had a spa-like experience. She talked to them about skincare, and told them the same thing I have - their skin is perfect. But it’s ok to have fun once in a while. So they had fun, got the itch scratched and home we went. I plan on talking about this all more and eliciting the help of some experts too - maybe even do a podcast on it next month. Kids grow up fast enough - it scares me. While this feels like a harmless thing, if you aren’t savvy to what it does to their skin, you actually are going to cause SO much more harm at an age when they are the most vulnerable. I hope this helped, and if it did, please share with your friends. xx Em
Does anyone have a recommendation for a simple, clean moisturizer (for a teenage boy)?
Great post. (Ellis Brooklyn Amber is my go-to as a 49-year-old woman. So easy to wear!)